Procrastination and Editing my work!

Why do I avoid editing my work? I can write a "creative non-fiction" piece in an hour sometimes. I have stories that are three years old and I haven't gone back and finished them. It would just take some editing to complete them. But, they just sit unedited and uncompleted!

I can think of lots of reasons not to sit down at the computer and finish a piece. I need to pay the bills, read, balance the checking account, clean the house, do the laundry, wash the dog, work in the yard, make dinner, shop for food, buy some plants, sew or mend a pair of pants and lastly work on the BLOG.

I'm retired. I should be able to fit everything in. Editing should have as much priority in my life as figuring out how to up the ranking on my website. Both of these are VERY important, yet they are at the very bottom of my "to-do-list".

Do I lack the skill--should I take an editing course? Am I afraid? OOPS, I THINK I JUST HIT THE PROBLEM! I'm afraid, no I'm TERRIFIED! If I edit my work and the story, any story gets completed, guess what? I then have to try to get it published. There in lies the problem. At least, I think that's the problem. I lack the confidence to market my work--I'm afraid to be rejected, especially over and over again. What does that mean--I don't think my writing is worthy of being published?

What if I am afraid, but not of being rejected--of being successful. Is it possible that I'm afraid of being noteworthy, outstanding, prosperous, arriving, famous. Maybe, out-shinning my husband and what the future would hold. Now, that would be sad.

I've wanted to be famous since I was in the eighth grade. There I said it and I didn't die. I WANT TO BE WELL-KNOWN, PROMINENT, CELEBRATED. Anyway you say it, I have to edit my stories to get it!

Debra Davis Hinkle